another flavor: To the girls who actually know comic book characters
Yeah, but we all still think you’re a dick? Because you’re that person who thinks that a woman in a superhero t-shirt is somehow a ‘slut’ (the most realistic leap of logic I’ve ever witnessed) until it’s proven that she can tell you that Superman’s real name is…
I don’t fucking care about your approval. I do care that you’re making the geek community that much more toxic for and unappealing to women.
Women don’t avoid comics and the comics community because they don’t like superheroes or don’t find comics interesting. Women avoid comics and the comics community because of assholes like you, and the fact that you’ll offer your grudging “approval” to the few who pass your arbitrary standards (while of course, the hordes of dudebros in Batman and Hulk and GL and Superman t-shirts get a free pass without having to prove anything) doesn’t win you a single goddamn bonus point.
Incidentally, the fact that you made that criticism gendered to begin with is really shitty. What pisses you off so much about not-up-to-snuff geek girls in particular? Is it because you assume we are trying to dupe you with our fancy superhero shirts so that you will… insult us? Tell us about your fancy comic-book collection? Think we are sexy? Did it occur to you that maybe ladies, like dudes, can like the idea of a superhero, and a superhero t-shirt, without knowing the excruciating details of continuity? Fuck you.
Here’s why: You know what is goddamn EXHAUSTING? Caring about something, and working your ass off to get good at it, and then never getting to engage with other enthusiasts (or, often, professionals) because EVERY GODDAMN CONVERSATION has to start with you jumping through hoops to prove you’re the real deal, because unless you can juggle three cover variants while reciting the clone saga backwards in French, your tits disqualify you from any subjects more advanced than “Condescending Comments about Vertigo 101.”
So, fine, you whip out your party tricks and minutiae and business cards, and by the time you’ve proven yourself to their satisfaction, either you’re so tired and discouraged that there’s no longer any point to that original conversation you wanted to have, or they decide to tell you how HOT it is that a girl like you is a genuine geek, and the sheer fact of your gender STILL fucking eclipses the actual thing you are trying to talk about. Because, GOD FUCKING FORBID that I am here to have a conversation about something I’m interested in, rather than to earn your approval of my brain-rack combo. Seriously, I LIVE for that. You’ve seen through my clever ruse: everything I do, I do in desperate hopes that someday, an anonymous doucheweasel on the internet will tell me how much he wants me to talk about the dark phoenix saga while he does me from behind.
No fucking wonder so many girls and women give the geek community a long look and then decide not to bother.
Am I ranting? Sorry—wait, no, NOT sorry. Because I just went to this amazing, explicitly girl-focused con where it wasn’t that way, where everyone just assumed that if you were there you were a geek, regardless your gender or color or what-the-hell-ever, and we could have conversations that didn’t have to start with a yardstick, and it was not only awesome but REALLY GODDAMN EASY. So I know that this bullshit is neither compulsory nor unavoidable.
Which means that you have no. fucking. excuse.
Get over yourself. We don’t care what you think. We don’t care whether we pass muster. Just stop pissing in the drinking well.
(TL:DR You’re an asshole, and you’re ruining it for everyone. Grow the fuck up.)